Do you find yourself waiting to do what you love until after you retire? After the children leave home? After you finish taking care of that other person’s needs? After, after, after…
Are you living the Life Deferment Plan?
You’re not alone. There is a way out.
First, identify what you really want. You know you are doing what You want when you are infused with enthusiasm.The word enthusiasm comes from the Greek word entheos, which means to be inspired by a god. When you are enthused, you are plugged in, and the energy flows. You are in alignment with Source – your purpose for being on the Planet. Not only will you feel good, but everyone around you will benefit as well. Marianne Williamson says that when you let your light shine, you give permission for those around you to do the same.
For those of you who feel it’s your mission to put others first, if you feel any resentment around what you are doing – that you are sacrificing time that you would rather spend on yourself, stop immediately and reconnect to Source, to yourself. Giving comes happily and naturally when you are doing what you love.
How? For some it is exercise, for others art, meditation, yoga, dance, travel, spirituality – whatever it is that takes you back to the place where you remember who you are and what you love. Go there daily to remember and then take at least one action step per day to honor yourself and those around you by taking time for you. Ayn Rand, author of the Fountainhead, says that it is a far greater gift to others to inspire others by being your highest self, than to directly assist them at neglect to yourself.
Your family, your loved ones, your friends, your employers – some of them will resist at first, but those who have your greatest interest at heart will grow to understand that you are not abandoning them. They will eventually rally around what you are doing. Some people, perhaps even a job, will drop away. But do not fear! A void is necessary to draw in the right people and opportunities.
I abandoned my life deferment plan 10 years to begin living and traveling around the world to tell the stories of some of the world’s greatest adventurers. I am not rich. I meet people living uncommon lives all the time and they are usually not rich either. All it takes is creativity and the willingness to look outside of the box, and the courage to go against the grain.
A month ago I moved from my now-home in Istanbul to Bali for the winter. Tons of self-inflicted guilt and resistance came my way, even a last minute injury almost causing me to cancel, but I came anyway, and it has been a precious, nourishing, and so RIGHT experience in every way!
I’ve not entirely mastered this skill of taking time for me. A few weeks ago a gorgeous Venezuelan man living in Bali began courting me. He helped me find a place to live, helped me move, introduced me to a meditation group in an ashram, a philosophy group, in essence he took care of me and I ate it up. Once seduced however, he began trying to convince me that anything that took me away from him should be eliminated. And for two days I found myself at his home in the jungle doing the things that mattered to him. I think I wrote for 20 minutes during those 2 days. We didn’t socialize with anyone else. My yoga classes dropped off. He said I should give up my home in Istanbul and move to Bali to live with him. He even tried to convince me that the offer of a free retreat I’d received in Bali in exchange for writing an article should be turned down because it would mean he couldn’t see me for a week.
Uh-oh, the old familiar feelings of losing myself came flooding back. How many times must I hit my head against this same wall before I finally get it? I “escaped” quite literally from his home in the jungle and am still struggling to resist his persistent overtures. I, like everyone, need love. But must I give up me for love? I’m trying to be ok with a void in my love life, keeping the faith that the right man for me will be in alignment with what I am doing (and me with what he is doing) and will support it, not ask me to abandon it.
As for you, whether it be a spouse or lover a job, a member of your family, societal expectations, whatever – remember that when you do what you love, you are entheos, and not only you, but everyone around you wins.
This is so important that I encourage you to join us this coming March 27-29, 2009 at a Time For Me conference in the Virginia mountains near Washington DC. Best selling author and speaker, Barbara Sher, will be the key note speaker– www.barbarasher.com. I’ll be speaking too, telling the stories of my global adventures these past 10 years and the amazing people I’ve met along the way.
Come take time for you. It will change your life. NoTimeForMe.net
Robin Sparks founder of OneWorld Ltd