Like a pack of dogs they appeared circling, surrounding us under the halogen lights, then with lightening speed, surrounding Helena and just as quickly, another pack coming to our rescue to chase them away. They barked and snarled, but within seconds the attackers had withdrawn into the dark alleys of Salvador. When Helena was safely behind her gate the dark angels of her hood disappeared into the night. My friend Eris and I strode up the now quiet street, me shocked into silence over what I had just seen. My first gang sighting.
Eris says that our hearts have different stories. He is right of course. He is 21 years younger than me. He wants a family. How quickly things change. Last week he asked if I would adopt.
I woke early this morning to sounds of birds, sat up and looked out the glass wall, the doors left open at a sky that was rimmed in soft pastel. Saudade. My last morning in this house.
Today I sail for Morro Sao Paulo. Have heard so much about the island. When I return, I will rent a car and drive up and down the coast looking for my home, perhaps as far as Puerto Seguro, where I may leave the car and fly to Sao Paulo. In Sao Paulo I will see a couple of friends, interview some expatriate journalists, talk to one friend about English Immersion vacations, and board a plane for the U.S. and re-entry into unreality.
Darkness hovers. Where is my light? I want it to flicker always like the candle Eris lit 3 days ago. The one he said “an oracion” over and said that we must never blow out.
“May I find my way home. And Eris his.”